so...i am back

I got back to America 3 days ago. I didn't realize restarting my life would be so hectic and chaotic, but it has also been full of blessings. I have a place to live, I have a job where I can make money to pay for school and living. I have helped mom put up the tree, I have gotten my teeth cleaned, I have gotten my phone reactivated, I even got to see my best friend's wedding dress! Being home is overwhelming and exciting and scary. It's odd to have found a place to live and a full time job and think to myself that I am now in Atlanta indefinitely. My mind doesn't really know how to handle that. I guess it's hard to stop the sort of momentum that I had. But also, I want to remember this feeling. Sometimes it feels so important for me to have a career and security, but all the security I need is in the Lord. Seriously, He had me covered in Geneva, in Jerusalem, and then I have a job and a house 2 days after I get back in America? Someone is taking care of me, and it definitely isn't my own planning skills.
But before I unravel all of the emotions of being home, I want to talk about my last days in Jerusalem and Geneva.

Jerusalem was hectic. Lydia was sick and throwing up on me, and I just couldn't get my mind around leaving and not seeing them soon after. I have left for long weekends before, and that is what it felt like. My heart still hasn't grasped what the distance means. I think I am avoiding feeling those feelings because there is so much here that needs my immediate attention. I don't have the brain capacity to cry over missing their unconditional love in my life. But they are tied to my heart like they are my kin. I hope and pray for their futures and I dream of seeing them again soon.
When I left the Fiores last Friday (just over a week ago), I went to Geneva for a few days. One guy from Jerusalem University came with me so he could experience Europe. And then a friend who is stationed up in Bamberg came down to visit me. I don't think I ever realized how much I had grown to love that city/country. It's beauty has infiltrated its way into my heart. It is now one of my homes and a place where I feel safe and loved. I spent one day with the guys going up to Montreux where there was a huge Christmas market and we went to Chateau Chillon. Then Sunday we spend the whole day with my amazing friends The Trumpers. It was a perfect day, filled with laughter, long walks, mulled wine, sitting by the fireplace, and eating ham & cheese together (so not kosher!). I felt so blessed to have the Trumpers in my life. They also have a place in my heart, they hold a cord drawing me back to Geneva. I got to see a lot of people while I was in Geneva, but I think the thing that hit me the most was just how sad I felt about leaving. My whole time in Switzerland I had made fun of people who were desperate to be Swiss, and then I find that I am turning into one of them. I suppose I would feel that way about any place where I had spend such a wonderful year. I was hard to leave.
My flight was Dec 7, Wednesday morning Geneva time, and then I finally arrived in the Atlanta airport Wednesday night. Even though my flight had been delayed...a lot, my sister, my mom, and my best friend had still stuck it out to welcome me home! They had signs and flowers and their wonderful faces to greet me. After talking nonstop for a few minutes, marveling at the weight of my two carry-ons, and getting my checked bags, we headed out for CHICK-FIL-A. (I am sure some people assumed that would be my first stop).
So now I am back, sorting out what life looks like for my in Atlanta. We've decorated the tree, we have our annual families from middle school Christmas party this weekend. I start work on Monday. I am go to Colorado on Wednesday. It's all a big whirlwind, but amid all my freak outs, I find peace in God's presence. Seriously though, I haven't had a heart-attack in these past few days because of his grace and provision. If getting a job my second day back isn't evidence of His taking care of me, I don't know what is.


So, that's all for now. I am going to try to go back to sleep for a couple of hours (it's 6 am right now). This jet lag is rough.

Merry Christmas!

last days in Jerusalem

I can't really say anything because I am feeling everything. I could write an entire post about my love for this place, my sadness about leaving this family, about how much I am going to miss this life of newness and adventure and precious children. Yet, I could also write about my excitement of returning home. I could tell about how I daydream of Christmas days with my family, of going shopping with my sister and helping my dearest friend plan her wedding and about how I am excited about grad school and living in Atlanta and rediscovering all the people I left behind.
I've got Margot on my lap right now and she is trying to play with the keyboard. I love her big cheeks and her big belly. As I told a friend the other day, every extra little roll gives me a extra joy. I will miss how Margot tries to squirm away when I give her kisses. And how Lydia shakes her head back and forth as if she is always disagreeing with me.


I will miss singing "The Fresh Prince of Bel Air" with Mia and being constantly amazed at her beauty and intelligence (she has seriously amazing genes). I am going to miss little Sam singing to himself and hearing those beautiful Godly lyrics coming out in his whispering little boy voice. I am going to miss little hands and giggling and dancing and the look on their faces when they figure out they can do something new. I am going to miss cuddles and kisses and the unconditional love that children give.

I am going to miss things about Jerusalem. I feel like this city has really strengthened me in my faith. I don't see how anyone can be lackadaisical here. Everyone is on fire here...and that goes for me too. It's been an intense few months, but I am thankful for every day.














And working for a Christian family has been such an amazing blessing. They were so encouraging as I kept learning and exploring. I mean, they pretty much organized a church service when I wanted to be baptized, how many employers do you know who would do that? I don't think they will ever know how much they have meant to me over this past year. The Fiores have been such an amazing example of Christ-centered living. And I have been extremely blessed by them.

Finally, the friends I have made in Jerusalem have shown me a heart for Jesus that drew me in and changed me, hopefully forever. I will never forget how they demonstrated the love of Christ in my life. Like I said, I am an extremely blessed girl.

This coming Friday (today is Monday, I will be heading back to Geneva for a few days and then I am going back home to Georgia. I am a big ball of emotions, but the only emotion I am letting surface and rule me is excitement. I don't want to waste my time being sad, I just want to enjoy these last few days, and be the best au pair and friend I can be. I have been given so much, and I want to return the favor. To you folks at home, I am SO looking forward to seeing you! I apologize if I talk way too much about Switzerland, Jerusalem, or the kids, just bear with me. Have a great day!

camel!

The countdown starts today: 16 days until I am back in America! Isn't that crazy? I have been gone for nearly a year. I left right after Christmas, and I am going to be back right before Christmas...a whole year has gone by for me, and it's funny that America has gone through a whole year too.

I am excited because I am going back to Christmas, back to my family and helping my best friend plan her wedding, and helping my sister decorate her new house (maybe), and back to school and friends that I have missed deeply. But, of course, I am still me, and I think that I will always be desiring more out of the world. I have had such amazing experiences thus far, that I can't imagine just being still. Seriously, I have created a family in Geneva, Milan, Jerusalem, Stare Splavy (Czech Republic), and I have friends freckled all over the world. I have been extremely blessed, and it's amazing to be in this position- to feel at home in so many places is unreal. And it just reminds me that wherever the Lord is, I can make my home with Him.

Speaking of my family here in Jerusalem, I had the BEST day yesterday! I have been wanting to explore more the Israel, and FINALLY I got to! We set out early in the morning from the Hill's house and headed to Masada: one of Herod the Great's creations. It is a city built on the top of a mountain, overlooking the dead sea. It is a engineering masterpiece, and has a crazy history of zealots living up there and being attacked by the Romans 1st Century AD. Apparently when the Romans finally finished their siege ramp, all of the Jewish zealots had killed themselves rather than be killed or go into slavery. From there we were headed to En Gedi, but the girl who drove my car knew how much I wanted to go in the Dead Sea, so she made a quick stop and me and my friend John ran down to the water so he could document my swim. I love stuff like that- changing in the car and then busting out and running at a stop on the side of the road. Unfortunately, when we got back, the other car had come back and told us the En Gedi was closed because of fear of flash flooding. I didn't really know what I was missing, so I didn't really mind (plus I had just swam in the Dead Sea! So, I was happy).

The other car decided to head home, but my car went on the Jericho. On the way, Emily pulled a U-turn when we passed a camel b/c she knew I wanted to ride on one (she's so great!). So I got to experience a camel ride! My camel's name was Charlie, but I didn't think that was very fitting, so I named him Sir Charles and pretended I was a princess waving to my adoring public. From there, we went to Jericho to see Zacchaeus' tree (Zacchaeus was a wee little man, and a wee little man was he... you know), and the remains of the first ever city, and a coptic church where Zacchaeus' bones are (supposedly), and then we had some mint tea and pizza at a great little restaurant.


All in all, like I said, a GREAT day! And I slept SO well last night b/c of all my adventures. I always love a great night's sleep after a long adventurous day. How cool is it that I have made friends here and gotten to go on a fun little road trip with them around Israel? I love life sometimes.

Right, that's all for now. Have a great day!

ignorance is bliss

I was glad when they said to me, "let us go into the house of the Lord." Our feet have been standing within your gates, O Jerusalem. (Psalm 122)

I was glad when they asked me to move to Jerusalem with them. Where I am in life, I crave adventure and newness and beauty and discovery. And all of that I have found here. I have been overwhelmingly blessed here. But this place isn't easy, you have to work for it, or I should say fight for it...and everyone does. They fight and they struggle and they haven't gotten anywhere. I say "they" because, literally, EVERYONE wants something more from this place. I've written some about all of it, so I won't get into who wants what, because sometimes it gets so convoluted you can't even figure out what you want, let alone anyone else.

And what's interesting is that it's all under the surface. Tourists don't feel it. Tourists walk around and take pictures of the interesting and beautiful things, they marvel at the Hebrew and Arabic script everywhere that looks like gibberish, they cross borders and pass through disputed land, and they don't need to be bothered by the fear and anger and struggle here. For a neutral European or American, it is probably the easiest living here. But if you have any relationship with Jesus, beware of all the spiritual warfare. Because, that's what it all boils down to. This is God's holy city, for better or for worse, and that means a lot of "rulers, powers, and authorities of darkness in the heavenly realms" are after it. Of course, if you don't believe in all that, you can just live in ignorant bliss.

But I am always encouraged by the words from Hosea
Then the Lord said to me, "Go again, love a woman who is loved by a lover and is committing adultery, just like the love of the Lord for the children of Israel, who look to other gods and love the raisin cakes of the pagans." So I bought her for 15 shekels of silver, and one and a half homers of barley. And I said to her, "You shall stay with me many days; you shall not play the harlot, nor shall you have a man- so, too, will I be toward you." For the children of Israel shall abide many days without kings or prince, without sacrifice or sacred pillar, without ephod or teraphim (idolatrous items of worship). Afterward the children of Israel shall return and seek the Lord their God and David their king. They shall fear the Lord and His goodness in the latter days. (Hosea 3)

But don't take my word for it, come here and experience it for yourself.

to please Him

Without realizing it, the years pass. Without realizing it, we change and become different people, for better or worse. Without realizing it, big things happen and we wake up amazed that our paths have lead us where we are.

I'm in Israel, if you hadn't realized. My world is 4 beautiful children who I've fallen in love with, an amazing family who have taught me more about the Lord and living in faith and graciousness and hospitality and having a Christ-centered marriage than I ever imagined I could have learned. My world is kosher falafels and crowded Arab markets and bargaining and conservative clothing. My world is ignoring any man that talks to me and craving people to connect with and, when I do connect, trying not to bore everyone with my stories of the kids. My world is constantly growing and learning and gaining new understanding.
This past weekend, I was baptized at East Jerusalem Baptist Church by my current employer, Sam Fiore.

Here's how it kind of came about (sorry if I already sent this to you in an email):
In the past few months, the issue of Baptism has come up a lot. It was all in random discussions and random sermons, but it happened so frequently, that I wanted to sit down and give some thought to what I believed about it all. I don't really care about different churches theologies, I just wanted to read the scripture and listen for the Holy Spirit and search out what would please God.

So, I did. And I got nothing. I asked people's opinions and felt semi-judged in different ways. Some people told me it wasn't an important enough issue to put so much concern into. And some were surprised that I hadn't been baptized as an adult believer. But, for me, like I said, it wasn't about theology or feeling like I wasn't already saved or doing something just to cover my bases, I truly just wanted to search out what I thought would please God.
I talked a lot with Michelle about it too, and she was always very supportive of my concerns. She is great to talk things through with because she doesn't let her personal beliefs get in the way of the Spirit. We had just talked one morning & I had ended up getting really frustrated because I just wanted an answer. I wanted to hear something definite. I wanted to feel assured, one way or the other, about what would honor God. And I finally just gave up. I decided that I would stop worrying about it, that if God wanted to convict me to get baptized as an adult, that whenever he did, I would be willing. I have been open to his calling and I will try to continue to be. So, as I was writing this in my journal and eating some Ben & Jerry's Dublin Mudslide ice cream, I heard from God.

The Spirit asked: "Do you think getting baptized will please God."
And I said: "yes"
And he said: "then why are you fighting it? what is keeping you from being baptized?"
And I said: "nothing, I am going to do it."

So, I did it. Here is Jerusalem. It was really hard to find a place to be baptized because everyone goes to the Jordan to be baptized and so no one has a baptismal. I wanted it to be easy. I wanted everyone to be able to come and for it to just be a sweet celebration of love for the Lord. I was willing to settle for a bathtub at Jerusalem University, but, we finally found a church with a baptismal. So, this past Sunday night, we invited everyone we knew in Jerusalem to come to the church to watch my baptism. Emily was here, so she got to be with me as I picked out songs I wanted to sing and I practiced sharing my testimony to her (I'll have you know we cried every time I told it). It was such sweet time, planning and praying and talking and singing through the hymns we wanted and baking cookies for the reception. So, the night came and there were so many people there! I was overwhelmed. I looked around and there were 40-50 people all there to share this with me. I was amazed that I had built up that kind of community in just a month and a half. AMAZED. There were even a few guys there who had just heard that a young woman was going to be baptized, so they showed up. It was unreal. And when all the JUC students came in in a huge group, my heart was so full. Things like this don't just happen. People don't come to a random country and make friends like this.


 So, I was overwhelmed by the Spirit and overwhelmed by the people who had come to support me and overwhelmed by how the Lord had been gradually bringing me to this point. He had taken me to the wilderness and spoken softly to me until I called him "My Husband" (Hosea 2:16). He betrothed me to Him forever, and I know Him (Hosea 2:19,20).

Emily was supposed to read this verse while I went to the back of the church on my way to the baptismal, but no one was paying attention, so I will write it out here:

"But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us richly through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that being justified by his grace we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life."
Titus 3:4-7

we've been here for years

We've been here for years
living off the land and collecting rain in our hands
we took the wrong path somewhere and we couldn't get back
the dam broke and the river rose
locking us in

how did you find us?
which way did you come?
we've been here for years
living off the land and haven't seen another soul

we lost our language and our ears
we lost our shoes and our feet
we lost our clothes and our bodies
we lost our thoughts and our dreams
we've been here for years
collecting rain in our hands
the dam broke and the river rose
locking us in

oh, no, we can't go back with you
we lost our shoes and our feet
we've been here for years
living off the land and collecting rain in our hands

oh, no we can't leave
we've been here for years


So much is happening here. Lydia and Margot just turned one. The weather is getting colder. The days are getting shorter. I've been hearing for the Lord & I am going to be baptized next week (hopefully). I am really excited :). My sister is thinking about buying a house. My best friend just got engaged. A good friend from Geneva is getting married in a week. Another friend is coming to visit me on Thursday. And the days I have left away from America are fewer and fewer. It's an odd time. I am excited and sad and hopeful and everything all in one.

The Holy Land is surely leaving its mark on me- relationally, physically, and spiritually. Every time I come to a new place and have to make new friends, I don't think I will ever be able meet people who match all the people I left behind. But, every time, I am overwhelmed by God's provision. I have a few places I can call home here in Jerusalem, one in Musrara with the Fiores, one in Talpiot with the Hills, and one on Mount Zion at JUC. Seriously? Can I be so blessed? I get excited just thinking how lucky I am.

Now, I don't really feel like sharing my soul on my blog, but I'll just say that, since I have been here, I have realized a lot about myself & my arrogance and stubbornness. And the poem I wrote above is about stubbornness & stupidity. I think, knowing that, it should makes sense.

Yesterday was the twin's birthday. This is the first birthday I have experienced where I felt a kind of relief & pride. It's a big deal for a baby to turn one. That they are just healthy and happy brings a sense of accomplishment. So I was kind of celebrating that. We got them through one whole year! Happy Birthday Girls!

dance with the joyful

There is a haze over Jerusalem. Desert wind brought dust in that fills the sky and my mind so I am always tired and fuzzy.

We just finished Sukkot, which is the Feast of Tabernacles (or Booths). We have a sukka outside our house that our neighbors put up. Basically what happens, is all the Jewish families put up these little wooden sheds outside their homes. If you read in Leviticus & Deuteronomy it talks about The Feast of Tabernacles, where every family is supposed to live in a booth built a certain way in remembrance for the Israelites living conditions when they were in the desert for 40 years. The weekend before Sukkot is Yom Kippur- the day of atonement. Everything is completely shut down as the Jews repent and ask for atonement. Then, from the following Wednesday to the next Wednesday, they eat all of their meals in this little hut. Some of the more observant Jews even sleep in them for a week. They even put sukkot at all of the restaurants so everyone can still go out to eat while still observing the holiday. I don't know what I was expecting, but I think I was surprised with this holiday because it was so much fun. There was tinsel and decorations everywhere. Our neighbors were constantly having guests over and having little dinner parties in their sukka. I guess it is just nice to see the people and the kids really enjoying this holiday, when they seem to live their lives so seriously. I mean, I would be that serious about life too if I only believed in the Old Testament, but it was just surprising and refreshing. There was even a big sukka set up in the Saffra Square near our house. They had music and games and all sorts of things set up for all the families. They had this bubbles station where the kids got to make this huge bubbles...I'll admit I enjoyed it a bit. For the Jews, this past week is the one time of year where God comes down and manifests himself with them, so it's pretty exciting. I can see why it is such a joyful celebration for them. And I think it is my favorite of all the Jewish holidays I've seen or heard of.

I have been really blessed to have been able to meet a bunch of different people here. I have really connected with some of the students at Jerusalem University, and I also have gotten involved in a Bible Study with some young adults from around Jerusalem. There is one Jewish girl, one Palestinian girl, one Bahamanian, and then a few girls from the states. I feel so lucky to be able to sit and talk with them about our different lives and hear their thoughts on life in Jerusalem. Reem started teaching me Arabic today, and she has even given me homework so I can practice while she is away. And last night, we had a sleepover and she was giving us all belly-dancing tips. I can't wait to one day brag, saying; "Oh, I just picked it up while I was living in Israel." No big deal.

The sleepover last night and one I had last week with some girls from Jerusalem University really restore me. Something about mixing chocolate, dancing, prayer, heart-to-heart talking, and chick flicks makes my life seem perfect.

Last Thursday I went to Bethlehem with some of the JUC (Jerusalem University) students. I had the day off so I went to Arabic class with them and then we all went to Wi'am- a Christian-based, Palestinian conflict resolution center. We took a tour of one of the refugee camps and heard about how hard their lives are, just 15 minutes and a huge guarded wall away from Jerusalem. I think I have been lucky because I am hearing both sides. I have heard from an Israeli who had 5 family members killed by Hamas, who blames the Palestinians for of his woes. I have talked to an Israeli soldier about the issue of keeping their people safe, and heard his somewhat one-sided approach to how that should be accomplished. I have listened to Netanyahu and Abbas on the news. I have been to Bethlehem and seen how the people actually live. I have a Palestinian friend who is only allowed out of the West Bank for a few days every month and only with special permission. I have heard the Zionists with their manifest destiny and seeming lack of concern for the Arabs in Israel. There is so much to say on this issue, and I don't think I have even scratched the service of all the differing emotions, but I love discovering it and thinking about it. I love learning and discussing and trying to sort through all the different layers and not let myself be swayed by every new bit of evidence.

Everything I learn and everything I see just makes me more and more confident that the true issues- the issues that go deeper than stolen land and boundary lines and a massive graffiti-ed wall that separates communities - cannot be solved by the government or a non-profit. This land and these people will only be restored and renewed by a Greater power. Christ will redeem this seemingly lost cause.

"I will build you up again and you will be rebuilt, O Virgin Israel. Again you will take up your tambourines and go out to dance with the joyful."
Jeremiah 31:4

And the kids- how could I only be mentioning them now? I guess they seem like such a part of my life, I am prone to either only talk about them, or only talk about things not pertaining to them. Seriously, though, I feel like a mom half the time because I talk about them so much. I am a little obsessed...which is one reason why I am not thinking about my departure. And, when I do, I only think about the exciting things I will be going to, rather than all I will be leaving. After the babies nap today, I went to get Margot and was trying to get her out of the room without waking Lydia. But, of course Lydia senses someone's presence and looks out from under the ball that she has herself coiled up in for nap and says "Hey" (or what I am positive sounded like hey). And then she sees me is says "kelly" for the first time ever! I don't care if no one else heard it, it sounded like kelly to me :)
And I am getting in the mood for fall, so I cut out some pumpkins that Sam and Mia could draw faces on. I gave them ideas for all the shapes they could use for the eyes and the mouth. Sam insisted on circle eyes and then he ended up putting the nose right in the middle of the eyes and Mia kept saying "three eyes, three eyes, three eyes," while I defended Sam's case about the nose. It was quite funny. And there is this movie that Sam is OBSESSED with. It is this big green bear basically telling kids the right way to behave (which is very nice indoctrination if you ask me) but it has the funniest songs about caring and cleaning & everything you would expect. It is just funny how Sam doesn't get sick of it. And I asked Mia how many times they have watched it, and she says "Oh, A LOT, like SEVEN times." They've totally watched it more than seven times, I like how that is her idea of a lot. It reminds me of when I first moved to Switzerland and she asked me if I was going to stay forever. I figured out how many days I would be with her and I told her, and she goes "that's close to forever." And it did seem like it then...with only 6 weeks left of forever..I don't want to think about it.

Bye! Happy Halloween!

around town

Hours turn into days, days turn into weeks, and I still can't get used to the fact that I live in Jerusalem. I keep reading the Bible and being like "oh, there it's mentioned again. Cool!"

I spend most of my free time reading or going to Jerusalem University and hanging out with the students there. I have gotten to explore more of East Jerusalem and experience the contrast between the Arab and Israeli side. It is crazy that there are such evident divides in the city without any actual boundary lines. You don't realize until after you cross the road that you are in another world- different language, different dress, different everything.
Yesterday we went to the zoo. My personal favorite was the penguins. They had a part where you could see underwater as the penguins swam. The babies followed them with their eyes and the kids ran from side to side as the penguins swam. Then the penguins would get out of the water and shake there little tails and we'd all giggle. It was grand. We roared at the bears and lions and impersonated the meercats (Mia's favorite animal). We were a little upset that the elephants were absent, but we got over it with the ice cream. Sam practiced his monkey faces and Mia proved herself a great map reader ("next is the cheetah, and the we'll be going to.....what's this animal called?")

Last night I went to a Bible study. At one of the churches I went to, I met this really cool girl named Kimmie who kindly took my number and told me she would let me know when things were happening. So, I walked to Talpiot (about 45 minutes away) and spent a great evening with a group of people I'd never met before. I love when that happens- when you just luckily (or maybe we shouldn't call it luck) stumble on a group of fun people. There was laughing and dancing and guitar playing and singing. It was wonderful. I kept looking around at everyone wondering what there story was and where they were from. There was one Palestinian girl who lived in Ramallah and she was worried she might have trouble getting past the check point that night. (In case you didn't know, the residents of the West Bank have to get permission to come into West Jerusalem, and they are usually just allowed in for a day. And she won't be allowed back until the 23rd, so we are already planning a girls night. It's the oddest thing to think that someone isn't allowed to go where they want when they want. I have never realized how blessed I am to be American. Seriously, it's great. We can travel most anywhere without even applying for a visa. My eyes are really being opened to the situation in Israel. Praying for the peace of Jerusalem never seemed more necessary (read Psalm 122).

And, another crazy thing, I don't know if I ever mentioned this, but before we even thought about coming to Israel, this random girl got stranded in Geneva. Her father recognized Sam's name on a church website he looked up when trying to find someone to take in his daughter, so he got in contact with Sam and she came to stay with us. Her father is a minister in Jerusalem, and knows Sam's parents (who are missionaries in Milan). Also, he is the minister of the church Michelle went to when she lived in Jerusalem. So- that girl who stayed with us in Geneva, and who lives in Jerusalem, has a sister. I was at her sister's apartment. Crazy, eh? It is such a small world.

Alright more on the Israel-Palestine situation, making friends, life with four kids, and other stuff later. I'm going to watch some Gilmore Girls & go to bed.

Have a good night!

the peace of Jerusalem

I went to church this past Sunday and they handed me a card with a picture of the old city on the front and an inscription on the inside reading: "Pray for the peace of Jerusalem. Psalm 122" So, I look up that verse in my Bible. Coincidence of all coincidences, I had read that chapter 2 days before I got this card. And I marked it and dated it noting that I was in Jerusalem when I read it. I won't quote it all here because you would might just skip over this post if I quoted a whole chapter of scripture- but it is basically a prayer of David, seeking the good of the city. Something has been coming on quite slowly for me, and being shown in a hundred different ways- the importance of what's going on here, in Jerusalem. It's in the news, it's in the streets, it's in people's minds and hearts. Now, I am not a Zionist and I don't really put a lot of stress on the actual importance of the buildings and the locale of Jerusalem, but after everything that has occurred here, I think it is important to take a step back and really ponder it all.

I have a few different angles on this, so bear with me...

Today, I was taking the twins on a walk when I guy semi-accosted me, singing his praises to the twin's beauty...or something (he was talking in another language). I didn't really know what to do. He had stunned me into hesitation, and then I couldn't just ignore him. So he just started talking. He talked about Netanyahu (Israeli leader) & Abbas (Palestinian leader) and the Palestinian state. He talked about his 5 family members that were killed by the Hamas (Palestinian Islamic political party that governs the Gaza strip). He talked about how the Palestinians don't want peace and Abbas won't negotiate, etc, etc. And he wasn't speaking English very well, and I don't really have a strong opinion on either side, so I just let him go. But, as I was standing there with the twins in the pram, I was struck by his convictions. I had heard so many people speak so strongly about the different sides to the Palestinian-Israel issue, but I hadn't really heard it directly from the heart of someone who cares like he did. He cares so much that he feels the need to share his feelings with a random American girl he passes in the street. And I can't argue with him. I don't know what it feels like to have family members blown up in bus bombs. I don't know what it feels like when someone wants to take your home away from you. But, the truth is, there is probably one Palestinian who would share there woes for every Israeli. There is so much hurt in this nation, just in this one tiny city...and to think, 3000 years ago, David had already started praying for peace here.

I live in West Jerusalem- the Jewish side of the city. A few blocks away there is a tram road that separates West Jerusalem from East Jerusalem- the Arabic side. At midday I can hear the Muslim prayers rising up from East Jerusalem. In this place, religion is everywhere...and the effects of religious (and thereby political) differences are blaring. Jews live in the Jewish neighborhoods and Muslims live in Islamic neighborhoods. There are Jewish buses and Arabic buses. There is Arabic and Hebrew on every sign. It is literally two different worlds waring with each other. And it is all so convoluted and confusing, that there truly isn't a right side and a wrong side. Everyone is to be pitied and everyone is to be blamed.

So, I was thinking through all of this as I was walking down the street one day. I was thinking about how impossible it all seemed. I know some people can right off one side or another in favor of Biblical prophesy, but that doesn't actually solve anything. In my mind I go through all the things that would have to change for their to be peace. I think about all the compromises that would have to be made or the lives that would be ruined. I think about all the fear their is here. It's not just a matter of politics, it is a matter of lives. It feels like such a lost cause. I pray for the peace of the city, but I don't really see any way it can come about. And then, I was reminded of the power of God. There isn't anything I can do, or Abbas can do, or Netanyahu can do, or anyone can do. It's impossible. But, cliche or not, nothing is impossible for God. No one is outside His will. And that gives me hope for this country. I can pray in faith, knowing that the Lord's will will be done, that his plan is greater than anything I could ever imagine. He has not forgotten his people.

I prayed at the Western Wall last night. As I stood there, I felt engulfed by the pain and hope that had been brought to that place for thousands of years. It made me feel sorrow for what's happened and renewed faith in God's almighty power.

It's the first day of the New Year today (Rosh Hashana), so here's to a new year and a renewed hope!

a week in..

No matter how different the culture is...even though I don't have any people to hang out with...even though I haven't figured out how to spend my time off yet...the life with the kids is pretty much the same thing. The crying continues, the laughing continues, the nap times are the same, the food's a bit different...but still good. We still have rose wine at dinner and coffee every morning. So, I guess I should just take comfort in the day to day.

Funny moment: today Sam spilled yogurt on himself and Mia wiped it off of his leg and ate it.

And even if I was having the worst day in the world- I just put the kids to bed and turned the tv on. Guess what's on. SISTER ACT 2!! I love this movie so much. Pray the kids stay asleep so I can watch it all.

Margot is at a neurologist appointment right now. I really don't know if there is any cure for febrile seizures- and I hope that is what they are. Or that this is just some fluke. But, she hasn't had any more seizures since the last the 2 a few days ago- so that bodes well.

Alright- Sister Act 2 is distracting, so I am going to get back to that. Have a great day!

in jerusalem

So, things haven't started here exactly as I expected. I live about five minutes away from the Damascus Gate into the Old City, but I have only actually gone in twice. And, to be honest, they weren't the most relaxing walks I have ever taken. But I'll get back to that. The reason things have been a bit different than I had imagined was because Margot (one of the twins) had a seizure on our second day here...then she had two more the next day. As you can imagine, it really changes the feel of everything. Not only did Sam & Michelle spent two evenings in the hospital, which makes my presence necessary on the home front. But, taking care of a baby who has seizures is pretty fearful business. I don't think I have ever known fear like I had when Margot had her fit on Tuesday. I was holding her when it happened and I think my heart stopped a little. The past two days I have been in constant prayer that I won't let fear take me over. I want to be strong and sure and helpful. But, more than anything, I want Margot to be healthy. Thankfully, these seizures (we believe) were fever-induced. So, as long as she doesn't have a fever, she should be okay. Please pray that she is okay.

Fear wears you out. And working overtime wears you out....so that might be another explanation for why I haven't been pumped to explore Jerusalem. Also, I don't really have any friends here as of yet. The current plan is to just stalk the students at Sam's University. I've had success with that method in the past (Lauren Angert, Katie Zurcher, Erin Lynch & Leanna Brown)...so I hope it will work again. I only have a short time here, and I really feel like it is a city you need to have company to explore (especially being a woman). You will be happy to hear that I have found my favorite bookstore already! I bought a book so I can teach myself Hebrew. I am very much looking forward to the day I can read right to left.

I have drawn a few conclusions from what I have seen of the city: mainly, this place is NOTHING like I have every experienced before. I have never felt so out of my element before. And maybe I am just being hyper-sensitive because I don't want the people in my ultra conservative neighborhood to be offended, or because I want to be above reproach, or because I don't want people to get the wrong idea about me. When I walk through the Arab market streets in the old city, I keep my eyes forward and the smile off my face. The shop men are constantly trying to entice me with their wares, and young boys yell out directions to me. I am afraid that if I so much as glance at my map, I will get a swarm of people trying to give me advice and "help me" find my way. I thought I had reach a safe place where no one would bother me when I got into the Jewish Quarter, but some old man saw me glancing at my map while I was sitting on a bench and he just came up and started giving me a tour without so much as asking me. I hate being rude, but I wasn't about to follow this random man around an unknown city. Sometimes I just hate being bothered.

But that's not really the annoying thing. I think what really bothers me is that, in the attempt to stay neutral and be invisible, I don't really get to enjoy being me. I can't laugh or smile, because the shop men always notice and make some obnoxious comment. I can't be open and gregarious because this isn't a friendly city. I can't dance in the streets when I hear great Arabic music coming from one of the stalls...and I so want to dance. I think that, for me, having friends around kind of takes the pressure off. I am safe in a group. I can somehow find both anonymity and self-expression in a group. By myself I just feel vulnerable. So- I will let you know how that stalking goes so I can get on with some real exploration.

You will be proud to know that there is one way that I am absolutely asserting myself. I have dressed ultra conservative for the past few day, and I am quite enjoying it. I feel like the less I look like a foreigner, the less I am going to be bothered by the locals. But, Michelle told me that I might have better luck if were to put up my hair. Blond Israelis aren't very popular, as you might imagine. And I guess having your hair down is just asking men to harass you...something I will never understand. But, being me, and being particularly happy with my hair as I choose to wear it, I decided to forgo taking Michelle's advice. That was the last straw, as it were. I will dress conservatively. I will refrain from smiling at random people. I will avoid eye contact. But I will NOT change how I wear my hair. Maybe that is a bit of unneeded stubbornness, but that's just how it's going to be.

And that is all for tonight.

My life is crazy and random and tiring and lonely and full and adventurous and scary...but I wouldn't have it any other way. I have comfort in the fact that you are all there caring for me and thinking of me and praying for me.

Lots of love from Jerusalem,
Kelly

upon my last day in Geneva

I am moving to Jerusalem tomorrow.

As you might know, Sam Fiore has been in Israel for the past 3 weeks taking classes and getting the apartment ready for us. It was with a big smile and a breath of relief on my and Michelle's part that we welcomed him home on Thursday. These past three weeks have been some of the longest of my life, and Michelle had it much worse than me. Thankfully, I was able to take a bit of a break and travel around the Loire Valley with Melissa and her boyfriend. It was the perfect last trip before going to Jerusalem. And, if you are under 25, you should totally try to visit all the castles because you only have to pay the reduced fare! Of course, if you live in America, it probably wouldn't be worth the discount if you have to fly across the ocean, but it was quite nice for me. So, 10 castles, 2 churches, and a couple bottles of French wine later, I sent Melissa and Daniel back to the states and I headed back to Geneva for my last week.

And now it's my last day. Geneva is going to miss me.

This morning was chilly and wet as I drove to church. And there was also a fly in the car that kept buzzing around my face- it was terribly infuriating. I really couldn't get my mind focused. And the rain kept pouring down on my windows....then I'd go through a tunnel and it would stop. Then rain. Tunnel. Pouring rain. Tunnel. Fly in my face. Then rain. Tunnel. You get the idea. Very distracting as a driver. I had my umbrella open and my jacket around me as I walked into church. I like the cold weather, so I wasn't really bothered. (I actually enjoyed getting to make use of my new leather jacket.) But, I didn't realize what the day had in store.

After church, I went to lunch. After lunch, I got in my car and drove home. Now, during lunch the clouds apparently all got together and talked about my leaving. Or maybe they heard everyone saying their farewells to me, and decided to give me a little goodbye present. When I walked outside, I walked into the most beautiful day. The sun is shining and there is a fresh cold breeze coming down from the mountains. It reminds me of apple picking in Georgia. It reminds me of Katie Zurcher's mountain/lake house and its wood-burning stove that heats the whole house. It reminds me of cuddling up in quilts drinking hot cocoa out of big mugs and marveling at the changing leaves. It is big comfy sweater air. It is run around in fields air. I am trying to soak it all up before I go to Jerusalem...where I hear mountain breezes and wood-burning stoves are hard to come by.

I had to say goodbye to a lot of people today. It was horrible. I hate saying goodbye. I would rather say "see you later" or just not say anything at all. The thing is, there are some people I am going to miss and I am going to keep in touch with, and there are some who I was just friends with for this season of life, and others who I was always around, but never really got to know. And all of those differing relationships make for some very awkward farewells. Especially because my mind is spinning at the idea of moving to Jerusalem tomorrow- so I don't even know what to think about it all, much less what to say.

There are also some people who are worried for me. Jerusalem is a pretty volatile place, and it will probably get even more so with the coming UN conference and the Palestinians requesting to be recognized as a nation. But, please don't be. I know without a shadow of a doubt that this is where the Lord is taking the Fiores. And I also know that where I am in life is exactly where God wants me to be. This isn't a mistake or something I am unsure of or something I am nervous about. If you believe in things being ordained by God- than you have to believe this is. It's exciting and it's nerve-wracking and it's crazy. But, at the end of the day, it is just following the plans the Lord has for me.

And, if nothing else, it is going to be an amazing adventure.

I will miss you too Geneva! Shalom!

Boswell out.

JERUSALEM HERE I COME!

So- that's the news.

I AM MOVING TO JERUSALEM! I am going with the Fiore's so Sam can go to seminary for a semester.

I will still be back in America on December 7- actually maybe earlier if Israel doesn't let me in ;)...but here's hoping that doesn't happen.

Sam is moving to Jerusalem tomorrow morning, so he can be at orientation Saturaday. The kids are going to go back to school on September 5, and then sometime after that Michelle, little Sam, Mia, Margot, Lydia, and I will be getting on a plane. I am not sure of the exact date yet, but definitely sometime in September.

I am REALLY excited. I love living in Geneva/Peillonnex and I will really miss all of the people I have met here- but since this city is such a transient place, some of my close friends have already left..so it isn't sooo bad. Plus, I am just trying to stay over-excited about moving to get through any sadness/difficult work that is going to take place before the big move. Since Sam is leaving before us, that means it is just going to be me and Michelle tag-teaming the kids...which might get a little overwhelming for me, seeing as I am just used to having them from 9-7ish.

But, it's going to be awesome. And, seriously, how many people have this sort of opportunity in their lives? Ummm- not many. This job might be the best one I ever have.

Alright- it's been a long day, so I am going to get some sleep.

Have a great day!

crazy times.

Alright- before I say anything else (like about my wonderful trip to Roma or Margot's really scary seizure), I have to say this: I HAVE BIG NEWS.

Unfortunately, I can't tell you what that big news is yet...but just wait. It will be worth it. Don't even try to guess what it is though, please. I am not pregnant or engaged- so just throw those ideas away. I just wanted to tell you I had big news, because I am utterly horrible at keeping secrets, and this one is burning a hole in my esophagus. (I don't know where that turn of phrase just came from.)

Some of you know what my news is pertaining to, if so, to you, I say: IT'S HAPPENING!! I can't say when yet. I can't give details.

For those of you who don't have any clue what I am talking about, just hold your breath- because it's exciting.

On a much less mysterious note, I went to ROME to see my parents! It was incredibly hot there, which was kind of breath of fresh air for me. Okay, yes, the heat did get a little oppressive as I was marching around the city standing in massive crowds at one of the biggest tourist destinations in the world. But, it reminded me of my wonderful Georgia! I miss Georgia summer. I love the heat. I love the warm nights. I love walking outside and feeling that humid warmth get in every pore. Yeah- I am probably romanticizing a bit, but just a bit. It was VERY hot walking around though.

Thankfully, I got really lucky when it came to lines. Usually, one has to stand in a really long line to get into Vatican City- but dad went early and stood in line for me and mom (such a gentleman). And then, the last day, I decided to spend the morning by the pool, seeing as I didn't want to be completely exhausted when I went back to work, and my parents had stood in a ridiculously long line in the oppressive heat for a ticket to the forum. When they looked on the ticket later, they realized it was also to the coliseum. So I used their ticket to get into the coliseum, and then mom had said it might work for the forum again b/c it was some sort of group ticket. So I tried...and it didn't work. But, when I saw the light go red, I wasn't really paying attention, so I kind of hesitated and then tried to go through the gate anyway...and obviously it didn't work. BUT, the woman who had checked my ticket hadn't been paying attention either, so she just thought I had waited too long and then gave me a really frustrated look and pushed a little button on the side of the machine and let me in. When I realized my luck I did a little hop and then skipped away from the turnstiles before anyone could realize I had gotten in illegitimately.


What frustrates me about being in Italy is that I don't speak any Italian. I can't stand being unable to communicate. French I can handle myself, German I can eek through, but Italian- I've got nothing. It makes a horrible dent in my pride.

On the way back to Geneva I stopped in Milan to see the Schaafsma's for a few hours, and then I went back to the train station to get my train to Geneva. As I was walking to my platform, this guy started talking to me in Italian. I know what you are thinking: oh no. You are right. Not only did this 23-year-old, Tunisian-Italian not speaking any English, he also refused to leave me alone. I guess I am just too nice. I literally don't know how he kept a conversation going seeing as I know maybe 10 words in Italian and he was even worse in English. When I told him I was going to Geneva he said: me & you go to Geneva. me and you go to Geneva. me and you go to Geneva. Some people just don't know when to quit. I wasn't really scared. I mean, I didn't think this guy was actually going to follow me onto my train after I said "no" about 10 times...but HE DID. I was like "WHAT ARE YOU DOING? GO AWAY? CIAO!!" And he just kept following me. Praise the Lord (seriously, praise the Lord), they have assigned seating on the train and I had a the last seat in a group of four seats facing each other. When I started to sit down and he realized he couldn't sit next to me, I just turned around he left. But, SERIOUSLY, what is the matter with people?

The rest of my trip home was pretty uneventful except for some really drunk old men dancing and screaming and taking their pants off in the back of my bus back to the apartment. It was a bit horrific, but I was too tired to notice.

Now I feel like I have done Margot a lot of injustice because I am waiting until the end to mention her. When I was on my way down to Rome, I stayed at the Schaafsma's for two nights. On Thursday morning we were all sitting in the living room and I was reading "Animal Farm" out loud for Jake, Max & Glori who all have it for summer reading. (I love to read out loud, as you might know). So, I am reading, when the phone rings. It's Sam (my boss) saying that Margot had a seizure while they were at Lake Garda and he doesn't have any idea where the closest hospital is or what to do. It was so intense. Lydia had been sick the night before, so I thought it was something about her at first, and then I was really surprised when Nina relayed Sam's call. Nina was really worried because she couldn't think about who the best person to call was. She is probably one of the most capable people I know, so if she isn't sure what to do, we're all in trouble. But then I heard her on the phone with speaking in Italian to the emergency responders near Cecina. It was a tizzy of emotions and fears and phone calls and prayers. I was probably the one expecting the worst because my mind went straight to Job (how God allowed the devil to take everything away from him except his life). God has really been rocking my world and the Fiore's world and He has really been evident, so I felt like Satan would try to mess with us...so, yeah, bad times. But, thankfully, Margot and the ambulance found each other. And a few sleepless nights later, the Fiore's are back on semi-solid ground. It seems like Margot is going to be okay, though the doctors aren't sure why she had the seizure in the first place. She seemed pretty normal today when I got to hold her in my arms again. But just keep her in your prayers..if you pray that is.

To close, a quote from Tozer: We cover our deep ignorance with words, but we are ashamed to wonder, we are afraid to whisper "mystery."

That is all for this evening. I apologize for keeping some of you from your very important office work.

Much love, Kelly

the times they are a changin'

I was marveling the other day about how much time has passed since I first arrived. I have done so much, and been so many places, but one of the most amazing things is having seen the kids grow. Mia and Sam's changes have been much more subtle than the babies, but definite. Sam has learned how to use the toilet and catch a ball. Mia has become quite a little storyteller. And they have both simply matured in ways I can't really describe.














As you might expect, the babies are amazing me every day with how much they grow and change. They've got teeth- Margot's are coming in all over the place so she looks like a jack-o-lantern when she smiles. They are sitting up SO well. They are making noises that sound like words. Margot has become a great little army-crawler (I swear her arms have little baby muscles), and I'm sure Lydia must be practicing her camera poses when we aren't looking). They are so cute, sometimes I feel I could just sit and admire them all day.

I have learned so much from these precious children. I haven't just mastered changing diapers and making scavenger hunts, I've seen God's handiwork. It's in everything around me, the mountains, my friends, and right in my own home. It is such a gift to live where the love of Christ is so real, and the blessings of God are so evident. It strengthens me and overwhelms me and fills me.

Watching children learn and grow is so much fun; yet it also gives me cause to think. I have seen them change SO much in 7 months, have I? Obviously, I realize that you can't stay on the fast track that little Margo & Lydia are on ..because then we would probably only live until we are 30. But, shouldn't we always be changing? Always be improving. Shouldn't I always be pursuing righteousness? It's kind of a lot to imagine getting better and better for the rest of my life..but it I try, I could be practically perfect by the time I die, right? Jk
In the spirit of change and improving oneself, in the strictly material sense, here is a picture of me making truffles today! I went with Martina to La Maison Cailler and ate WAY too much chocolate. It was a really fun day, and I learned a very practical skill. If you ever find yourself near Geneva, you should definitely go.

Have a wonderful day!

la vita e bella

Last minute tip to the the lake house on Lake Garda last week. No big deal.

So, for the past 20 years, the extended Fiore family has had a share in an apartment in Cecina, Italy. The best way to describe this town is the quintessential small Italian village that you probably have an oil painting of over your mantelpiece. It's the image everyone has in their mind when they think of small town, picturesque Italy. You look at the picture on the wall and think: "Someday, I want to go there." Well I was there...working. And it was perfect. We spent two days at the beach and one day visiting a more touristy town on the other side of the lake. We ate fabulous Italian pasta and pizza and topped it off with gelato. I'm sure I have said this before, but I sincerely love my job. And, obviously it isn't because of things like this. Because if the kids were bratty and horrible I would be miserable...even at an Italian beach.


Best memory: I took little Sam to the bathroom and there was a picture of Marilyn Monroe on the wall. Here is the conversation that ensued:
Me: Do you like Marilyn Monroe, Sam?
Sam: yeah
Me: What do you like about her?
Sam: I like her breast
Me: Her dress?
Sam: NO, her BREAST

I swear I didn't teach him that.

Sam's sister and her family (the Schaafsma's) are over right now and Nina just handed me a chocolate croissant. Just saying.

There is something about Italy- maybe it is the warmth in the air or the general friendliness of the old Italian woman (compared to the general unfriendliness of people in Geneva). I love being there. I love taking walks and looking at the beautiful scenery and exploring the hills and seeing the old architecture. I love enjoying the food and the wine and hearing the language. I just feel at peace.

Okay, I should probably get back to work.

Have a great day!

seeing the sights

Hello all!

Sorry I haven't written in a while. I am going to claim the fact that I went to the Czech Republic for a week, and the getting ready/traveling/settling back in has taken a long time. First of all, I absolutely LOVED the Czech Republic. I don't think I can explain it...but I will try. See, everyone told me I was going to love Prague, and I tried to take that with a grain of salt. Usually, when everyone tells me I am going to love something, I don't. Maybe I just don't like the idea of jumping on the bandwagon or doing what people expect, and it has turned into a psychological problem...but, when I tell myself that I am going to love something- I usually do. Again, it could be that I psychologically fool myself into loving it...or maybe I just know myself really well. Sorry if this is all really confusing. Basically, everyone told me I was going to love Prague...and because of that I wasn't in a huge rush to visit the Czech Republic's capital city. I mean, I knew I HAD to, just to see it. And, you can't go to the Czech Republic and not see Prague, right? But, regardless of what other people told me about loving the city, I knew I would love the country on the whole. And I DID
My wonderful friend Martina was really upset when my other attempt to visit her country failed miserably...so she invited me to stay with her family for a week! After sorting out timing and flights, I was on my way! Her family lives in the Northern region in a little lake town called Stare Splavy. I LOVED her family even though we couldn't understand each other AT ALL. But that made it kind of funny and awkward and, on the whole, wonderfully pleasant. Martina's grandmother was really excited about me coming and wanted to cook me a traditional Czech meal (rabbit, pork, dumplings, red cabbage & white cabbage). And it was topped off by a celebratory "welcome drink" - champagne, a glass of beer (her grandfather insisted the I had to have beer with this meal), and then a shot of plum brandy with her grandparents. They tried to get me to have another shot (for my other leg- apparently you have to have two or you will be "unbalanced"), but I was already feeling my American's-don't-know-how-to-drink-ness, so I politely declined the offer.

The week included a trip to Prague, visiting some friends from Pine Forest Camp where I worked last summer in Hradec Kralove, hiking up to Bez Dez castle, laying out at the lake near her house, going to see Harry Potter in Mlada Boleslav, touring Cesky Krumlov with Martina's mom and friend (and drinking Champagne with them from a gas station on the car ride home- don't worry, Martina was driving), and practicing how to drive a stick shift in an abandoned air field near Martina's house. So, yeah, it was GREAT. Martina and I were both so sad to leave. We kept joking that we were probably two of the saddest people who have flew into Geneva. Vacations are lovely things, aren't they? Maybe I should move to Europe just so I can have the 5 weeks off, it's fabulous! Of course, I am going to be a teacher- so I thinking I will have plenty of time.

There was a lot more to my trip- but I think writing it all out is more trouble than it's worth. You can always just stalk my pictures on facebook.

If I were to make any suggestions about visiting the Czech Republic, I would say: have someone Czech with you. Seriously, unless you are just going to stay in Prague (which really doesn't count as experiencing the country), it is best to have someone really show you around. I think my favorite place was Hradec Kralove. Maybe because I wasn't expecting anything from it, and it surprised me. It's a beautiful city with parks and two rivers and a gorgeous city center. Also, if you have ever desired to indulge in alcohol- it is ridiculously cheap in the Czech Republic. One night I got a pint of beer AND a cocktail for less than 5$. That doesn't exist in Geneva.

So that's all about my trip for now- biggest news is that my parents are coming to Europe and I am going to MEET THEM IN ROME! I love Italy, and I love my parents, so I am really excited. Then my sister is coming with her bf and we are all going to tour the Loire valley together. Hopefully I will be able to impress Melissa and Daniel with my French :).

I feel bad now giving my family just one small paragraph- but I getting sick of writing. So I will have to do them blog justice when they actually come.

Have a wonderful day!

Living without Limitations

It's the Fourth of July!!! Happy Independence Day Americans! I wish I was in Hilton Head, South Carolina right now. I love that place. I love fireworks and summer dresses and sparklers and watermelon and cakes with blueberries and strawberries on them to make them look like American flags. I wish I was home for the fourth of July, but I guess it wouldn't make any difference, because I am sick today. I could probably stand about 1 hour of festivities and then have to go find a quiet spot to cuddle up. I hate being sick so much. But the one great thing about it, is it makes me thankful for the days I am not sick (which is most of the year). I was thinking about that when I was hiking last weekend. I was doing the "hard" hike (mainly because it cost more money to ride up the cable car to get to the easier climb), and I just kept thinking to myself "I am so happy that I have the ability to do this." I am so happy to be healthy and have all of my limbs and be able to run and swim and just live without limitations.

And all that reminds me of something I was thinking about earlier today: why am I here? Let's be honest, the main reason I came here was because I didn't have a reason not to. I kept saying to myself: "Why not move to Switzerland for a year?" I didn't have anything holding me back: no job, no boyfriend, no mortgage. And it seemed obvious to me that the Lord wanted me here. I mean, honestly, how many people get a call in a place where they don't get cell service telling them "they HAVE to be an au pair for an awesome family"? That call was made by the wonderful Amy Lazenby, and if the Lord is using Amy to get you to do something, you know you are going to have to give in eventually, because she won't take no for an answer unless you have an really good reason. And, like I said, I didn't have a good reason. So, here I am. And I have been asking myself: "What am I doing here?"

Margot LOVING bathtime!

I keep feeling like this is just a pause out of my "real" life. That I will go back to Georgia, go back to school, go back to living with my parents, go back to work, go back to my friends, basically go back to the life I had before I left...and that was kind of a depressing thought. I want to change. I want to grow. I didn't move to Switzerland to stay the same person. And more importantly, God didn't send me to another place with completely new people and experiences to not show me something or use me in some way or teach me something.

So, I know that, when all is said and done, when I go back home in December, I will have changed...or I will have done something for the Kingdom. Maybe I won't figure it out until I am sitting in class in Georgia, or maybe I will never know. But I am sure that there is something for me, or something for me to do here. Which is exciting. Also, know that you are wherever you are for a reason.

This weekend I was able to talk to my sister, Rachael Mirabella & Beka Adam on the phone. I was sick...so other than going out and buying myself a blueberry muffin, that is pretty much all that I did. And it was SO worth it. If I hadn't been sitting around the apartment chugging orange choice and wasting tissues, I wouldn't have been able to talk to 3 of the best friends a girl could have. I have come to realize a lot about myself while I have been here. 1- as horrible as this sounds, I am NOT a naturalist. Don't get me wrong, mountains are BEAUTIFUL, and I absolutely appreciate their magnificence. But I don't GET anything out of them, does that make any sense? I feel like I am wasting the fact that I live IN THE ALPS, especially when I hear other people talk about mountains. If this probably sounds like blasphemy to some of you, I apologize.

2- I am totally a homebody. When I was talking to Beka yesterday she was like "duh, Kelly, I could have told you that." I guess I always thought I was more independent or something, but talking to people who know me so well, how know me deeply, I get more out of that than out of any mountain range. I like digging in roots, being around the same people, really being known and knowing others. I like people knowing my secrets and wanting to know more. I'm not good at the surface, "get to know you" stuff (I am not that good of a conversationalist). As exciting and fun I find moving to a new, beautiful foreign country, it doesn't touch the joy I get out of the relationships I left behind. And making relationships like those takes time...which no one seems to have in Geneva. Thankfully, I have been blessed with friendships here, but I still learned that friends like I have in Georgia are few and far between, and I am SOO thankful for them.

If you are at work reading this: shame on you, get back to work. (Haha Yen)

Have a fabulous day!!